I Pledge Allegiance to Myself

So in my last posting I spoke of a goal I had to post a 4 part series on commitment.  So I plan to do so.  In brainstorming these posts (which consists of my mind wandering a million different directions at the most inopportune times) I came up with the 4 following compartments of commitment that speak to my particular season of life.

  1. First and foremost I have made a commitment to self:  personally, spiritually and physically.
  2. Commitment to my people, my clan:  This includes my husband, my little man, my extended family and my friends past present and future.
  3. Commitment to my community:  More needs to be done in my life to foster community and service to those around me.  This goes hand in hand with my commitment to my clan.
  4. Commitment to Work and Education:  I lump these two together because they take almost equal effort lately and both are full time. 


These are the areas that I feel need a deeper level of commitment from me in my current season.  Your season may be different, in fact, it probably is. I think that most of us need to take a look at our commitment to ourselves, and this is why I list this one first.  For me it is the most important because it is the one that has been most neglected.

For me commitment consists of three silos:

  1. Physical wellness
  2. Mental wellness
  3. Spiritual wellness
My physical wellness commitment begins with a hard truth.  I was definitely consuming too much alcohol.  Now I am not an alcoholic by any means, but I realized that I was using alcohol to wind down, handle stress and gain confidence in social situations.  So the first commitment was to wipe my alcohol slate clean and determine if I could use alcohol in a healthy manner.  So far so good.  I have more energy, I sleep better and I suffer less guilt.  Now I am not saying that consuming alcohol is unhealthy for everyone, but I was using it as a coping mechanism, and that is not healthy at all. Alcohol was also a big contributor to weight gain for me.  Cutting it out for 30 days gives my body a chance to recover from the empty calories and false sense of confidence. 

My first week of the new year was not my mental wellness capstone by any means.  I was deflated mentally.  I had the holiday postpartum depression mixed with the devastation of a failed dissertation proposal. It was not pretty I even ugly cried in a parking lot, but a regroup, new haircut and some deep conversations with myself, spouse, friends and my maker and I was back up and running.  My commitment to my mental awareness begins with letting go of being perfect, cause this may come as a shock to you (because it certainly was to me)...I am not. I sometimes, (aka oftentimes) live in my own head. I live in my own worry, self doubt and the worst of all in my own what ifs. Ugh, those what ifs will kill you.  My commitment to myself is to ditch my head, not in a headless horseman way, but when I find myself obsessing about something out of my control, I am committing to turning it over to my maker. 

My last silo is a commitment to my Spiritual wellness.  It doesn't really matter what your world view, or your belief system, you have a responsibility to your Spiritual wellness.  I am a Christian so my spiritual wellness means spending time in the Bible, committing to a quiet moment to listen and meditate and to internalize what I learn, while developing a plan for application.  Your belief system may not be the same as mine, and I love you for that, but your spirit needs to be fed.  So if your belief is no belief at all, perhaps it is time to have a deep conversation with yourself on what you find purposeful in your world. 

Self-Care is hard. It requires asking and seeking the answer to tough questions, but I feel that this commitment is so important.  If we do not commit to being better versions of ourselves, continually, there is no way we can keep commitments to our others.  

Have a great week all, I love you guys!



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