Change is the Only Constant


This week gave me a lot of changes both elating and terrifying. With the help of my caring Ex I leased a new car, giving me a car payment for the first time in 5 years.  We transitioned to the split custody of our son, and my son met a new friend (mommy's friend).  All of these changes were scary....bittersweet.  As I sat signing the paperwork for my new car, which I love, I couldn't control the tears, and they fell freely. I mourned the loss of my car that drove my baby since he was one year old.  The vehicle that took him to his first day of pre-school and Kindergarten.  I mourned the time I would no longer spend arguing with him to do his homework or get ready for bed.  And I realized how this was the end of my old life, the actual end.   I know that change is necessary sometime, but you can't help but mourn what was.

I think that change is something that we fear because it is something that we cannot control. We can certainly try, but change will still come.  It is that lack of control, not the change, that makes us uneasy and sorrowful.  We mourn what was because we lack the vision to see what is to come.  It is easy to think of change as the death of something familiar, but we fail to see it as the birth of what could be.  I think of change as ominous sometimes, and that keeps me gripped in fear.  I am learning to let go of that fear one, because I know God's got this, and two because I can't stop it.

As I was driving home today there was a terrible accident on the road.  A car had flipped over and there were emergency vehicles.  I couldn't help but think that in an instant, everything changed for the people in that car, everything changed for their family and friends.  I couldn't help but think back to a year ago when my life was changed forever because of a similar accident, and I mourned that change.  Then I began to think of how different things were a year ago, and how much changed had occurred in such a short period of time.  There have been hard, sad, joyous and happy times, but only one thing is constant.....Change.

Robin Sharma states, "Change is hard at first, messy in the middle and gorgeous at the end".  Change takes courage to endure, and it takes surrender to survive.  I think back on all of the change and how it changed me. I am in no way the person I was two years ago.  In some ways I am much better, and in some ways I am working to be much better.  I am taking change in stride and trying to make the best of all of it, even when it hurts.  I challenge you to look at change as the gorgeous end, and acknowledge that you have to go through the hard and the messy to get there.  I feel I am at the tail end of the messy for this particular season of change, but I know there will be other seasons.  Right now I am taking one change at a time, and so should you!

Love and Light.


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